00:00.0
00:03.0
Congress has launched an investigation of MIT.
00:03.1
00:05.4
Angry alumni are withholding donations,
00:05.5
00:07.8
pro-Hamas demonstrations have broken out
00:07.9
00:12.4
in Lobby 7, 10, and the LGBTQ lounge,
00:12.5
00:15.4
and the Black Student Union has surrounded Hillel.
00:17.1
00:20.1
Don't worry, our new Vice President of Equity & Inclusion will sort this out.
00:20.2
00:22.6
Our BELONGING campaign will succeed.
00:24.7
00:26.8
President Kornbluth.
00:27.3
00:30.0
Our entire DEI program ...
00:31.0
00:33.7
... has collapsed. Intersectionality and decolonization poisoned the campus.
00:34.2
00:36.4
Every identity group is at each other's throats.
00:52.7
01:10.7
Everyone out except Chancellor Nobles, Provost Barnhart, Toady Espich, Lapdog Barret, Grifter Reagans, and Minister of Propaganda Haslanger.
01:13.1
01:15.1
What kind of a shitstorm have you handed me?
01:15.2
01:17.8
They told me this would be a cushy job.
01:18.2
01:23.4
You people have 150 frigging DEI staff.
01:25.4
01:28.2
You've been "training" MIT students for years.
01:28.3
01:31.3
How did so many of them turn into antisemitic jihadists?
01:31.4
01:33.9
Jewish alumni want to cut my balls off.
01:34.3
01:37.6
It's a good thing I don't have any.
01:37.7
01:40.6
I kept you all in place when I took over, and this is how you thank me?
01:40.7
01:42.6
We were just following Past President Reif's orders.
01:42.7
01:46.4
Rafael Reif? That emasculated idiot!
01:46.5
01:48.5
But he raised $5 Billion dollars to Build a Better World!!
01:48.6
01:52.0
So the fuck what. If Congress kicks us off the gravy train, it’s all over.
01:52.1
01:55.5
That bitch Stefanik already sacked the presidents of Harvard and UPenn.
01:56.1
01:57.8
The President of MIT is surely her next scalp!
01:57.9
02:00.8
What happens if they dredge up my role in the Duke coverup?
02:00.9
02:03.8
You think plagiarism is bad?
02:04.4
02:08.0
Two patients died in that bogus clinical trial.
02:08.3
02:13.1
Duke hushed it all up with a fat settlement, but that was then.
02:13.9
02:16.8
The whole story came out in that January 9, 2015 Cancer Letter.
02:17.1
02:21.7
Once that bloodhound Bill Ackman gets on my trail, I'm toast.
02:26.9
02:30.0
My whole career championing women in science is circling the drain
02:30.1
02:34.2
all because you intersectional nitwits declared war on Jews.
02:34.3
02:38.2
Self-loathing Jews paid for all this DEI shit!
02:40.9
02:42.8
Why did you have to wake them up?
02:42.9
02:47.7
We could have kept milking them like all the other universities.
02:47.8
02:53.1
But no! A pack of raghead rapists had to screw the pooch.
02:54.0
02:56.1
Where will the trannies go for empowerment now that DEI is dead?
02:56.5
02:59.8
How can we keep discriminating against men in admissions and hiring?
03:00.0
03:02.5
Do you know what it means if merit replaces affirmative action?
03:04.7
03:09.1
Don't worry, we can all get jobs at Oberlin.
03:14.2
03:16.3
I guess I can go back to the lab.
03:19.2
03:23.2
All those smelly test tubes.
03:25.5
03:30.0
Training third-rate biologists that will never find jobs.
03:31.5
03:33.8
And what do you think will happen to you all?
03:40.2
03:46.2
Once the DEI game is up all you phonies are worthless.
03:46.3
03:49.0
Failed college administrators will be queueing in breadlines.
03:53.7
04:00.0
"You want fries with that?"
