Malcolm Turnfool, The one they thought was the great white hope.

He is the Australian Prime Minister this week

Anyway this year he made the Census online
He told everyone their data would be safe

We have a fool proof system

So census night comes

And he does his census with his fibre everywhere

The rich mans NBN, so easy he tweets

So anyway the poor people try to do the census

on the poor mans copper NBN

and boom the internet breaks

not for a minute, not for an hour
for TWO Days

Every expert in the Government trys to explain

oh we were hacked, yes hacked
No wait, we were not hacked

Now don't worry, your data is safe
Trust us, we work for the Government

There was NO data loss, nothing

then of course there was no data loaded either

Then Mr Turdface is so mad

because the site crashed at 10am

and they told him at half past eight that night

There is no transcript of that conversation

So he finally has a press conference

and he says there was no data loss, really

trust me I invented the internet

they gave ABS 250 million dollars

and what do they do?

the ABS give IBM 10 million to do the job!

you can't make this stuff up

But really, your data is safe?

the FBI, NASA and the Federal Reserve

have all been hacked

but not the Australian Bureau of statistics

Anyhow Turncoat has to appear to be in charge

so he finally says "heads will roll"

He only has 67 seats in Parlement

so you KNOW it won't be McCormack's head

probably that Kalashnikov or whatever his name is

The opposition dude is squawking like a turkey at Christmas

And carrot top will want a Royal Commission

and all Scott Morrison can think of

is 25 million people paying $180 a day

they don't fill out the census form