Here is the Election Day briefing in Demoncrat-run Ward 1

ATVs have been seen here on U Street and by the Wawa

DC Homos has continued tweeting and was last seen in Adams Morgan

Regensburg, Steiner and the MPD votes will overwhelm them

Mein candidate...Steiner

Steiner didn't switch his registration from Republican to Democrat. None of the MPD did so they can't vote for you and we're losing by 11%.

Everyone who couldn't vote for me because they live in Pennsylvania or didn't switch their registration get out of this room.

This is absurd! This whole election is absurd!

Jo-Ann said the Post endorsement was all I needed!

Jonetta told me I had this in the bag!

Whose idea was it to have a campaign manager whose initials were SS?

How was I supposed to know the Democrats had Google?

Mein candidate we deleted all of your tweets

And they still figured it out anyway!

Mein candidate, you picked Will and Erik yourself

And you had to go out and get caught tearing down campaign signs in front of 40 thousand viewers

She stole this election from me!

She got all of the union endorsements and all you idiots could get me was dirty Republican DFER money through Victory Fund!

And now everything I've worked on since June 2020 has come to nothing!

I had to put up with so much woke crap to try and fool them

These whiny Ward 1 voters are to the left of Stalin!

I gave up being a cop for this

I loved arresting people, crushing their dreams

I miss it so damn much

Now all I have to look foward to is writing for the DC Line like a washed up hack

What fucking good was Anthony Williams when he doesn't endorse until the end of the campaign?

Why did we listen to Josh Lopez?

Why the hell weren't we vetting people after the William Pack story came out?