This is a bird feeder,

and everything you see surrounding me in my yard

is an attempt to protect it

from four theiving squirrels.

If they want the bird seed and the lifetime supply of walnuts in this bank vault,

they'll first need to pass through my nine-part obstacle course.

By design it's extrememly challenging;

It's meant to test their mental limits

and their physical limits.

I help back no punches,

but I have to admit in hindsight,

I once again completely underestimated my adversary.

And truthfully, I'd never thought I'd be that crazy guy in the neighborhood obsessing over the squirrels.

But they started it first

when they would constantly pillage the bird seed

from any bird feeder I put up about a year ago.

That lead to me defending it with an obstacle course

which they handedly defeated.

And so after a year of ruminating on how to avenge that L

with a majorly improved version,

and then 2 months of planning,

my buddy John and I got together

for a 20 second build montage.

[MONTAGE NOISES, i.e, sawblade, paint-can ASMR, etc.]

Here are the basic elements:

For starters, here's their favored bird feeder at the end of the course.

It is sitting atop Fort Knuts, the most secure walnut vault in the western United States.

Now since birds can fly, they can come and go as they please

and eat all the food they want.

But the only way for the squirrels to make it right here

is by surviving

my nine-part grueling obstacle course.

Which all starts right here, climbing up the pole, to this platform, is the single gateway to enter the course.

Every other pole you see has some kind of counter-measure

to keep the squirrel from just climbing up and then entering the course halfway through.

And so the first challenge is this casino,

which may seem like an odd choice,

until you realise that as we were building the course, we also built them little squirrel houses.

So we put them up in a couple different trees

and after a few days, it looked like they actually made some renovations.

So I went to take a closer look.