Sources mention his docker image was based off ubuntu

Its reported size is greater than 9 gigs and has caused severe internet congestion to download

We have lost container registries in AWS, GCP, and Azure

We have reason to believe that he packaged an entire VM into the docker container. We are working actively to question him regarding these claims.

Ah yes, surely the container itself is extremely performant and is working great inside kubernetes

Sir

The entire production Kubernetes cluster..

The entire production Kubernetes cluster has crashed with numerous pods lost. We have no way to stop them from crashing. Virtual racks is in flames and we fear we will lose our early adopters.

Everyone in this room except for Mark, David, Vrajesh, and Jenn. You can leave now

Who the hell gave him developer access in AWS?!

A tester I could understand, but developer!?

He had no business touching anything outside of minikube. Which one of you actually believed his seat monitor was ever going to work

My god, we are going to lose so much damn money on this effort. Joe is going to have me in his office on Monday morning

We need to come up with a plan, blame David Strand. Say he tried to help him and didn't want to cause any trouble. I don't care what you have to do, just take away his damn privileges now

Sir, we can just take his privileges away like that. Our IAM is not built that way

Don't give me that IAM crap, do something or your job is finished. Re-structure the damn roles now!

The roles alone would take hours. We don't have the manpower to do something so radical

Manpower!? What are you a junior developer!? I suppose I have to do everything myself. Just re-map his role to a tester account and the issue will be solved