Agent Jono says the operation started at 07:30.

Scaled Ben Nevis, took selfies, as you requested. Now descending and following this route here.

We think there is no danger to the operation and they need to follow this river to the next peak.

This is as agreed earlier with the elite team - Gards, Al and Young Joe?

It's just that Jono thought this was probably something we could arrange ourselves - and ignore that particular plan.

Those here that were not part of this decision - go, leave now.

JONO, JONO, JONO!

Are you shitting me? This IS exactly what he does!

Again, again and again? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills here.

This is exactly the kind of shit we wanted to avoid, didn't we?

Nevis, Scafell and then Snowdon. Repeat it you idiots! Where the hell is he taking them now? Where? Must I do everything?

Fucking sick of this.

If I may just interrupt - it's because we don't know who's boozing.

Boozing? Supposed to be Team Hope not Dope - you F***ing dope!

Fuhrer... your blood pressure. Brad will never forgive us.

Forget Brad you fuckwit! It's you he'll paste! This is about team Hope! I'm fucking sick of this pencil! it's about as sharp as you!

Listen to me. Your stupidity has jeopardised the whole mission. It's like dealing with those fuckers GMP, Eurosport and...bastard Islington Council.

Next I assume you'll say Em and her bloody mate are outside listening to this debacle.

No? Fucking Putin's not out there is he? Oh I'm shitting myself!

I said it a million times, Kendal mint cake! Cake! Cake not Coke you arse!

It can't be that hard. Cake! give them cake and take their fucking mountain! I want them all - ALL!

Wherever the fuck they are. Shit. Even FARAGE couldn't have fucked this up as spectacularly as you!

Should have called Stalin.

Anyway, who's boozing?